(Image Credit) I walk in the door,
Baby boys pulling, hugging, knocking me over
with their love.
And all I can think about
are the reports I brought home
that have to be read.
I check work emails
while keeping one eye on them in the tub.
I read stories, say prayers, sing Good Night Song
as I fight to stay
present.
The stress of a new position, heavy on my mind
hanging over me like a smothering cloud.
This Merry-Go-Round life
goes faster and faster and faster.
I run, try to keep up
and not skin my knees.
Author’s note: I do like my new assignment and all the challenges that come with it, but I’ve never felt the pressure of balancing my career and motherhood as much as I do right now.
* * * * * *
This post is linked up to One Shot Wednesday. Although I in no way consider myself a poet, I enjoy being able to share my musings with others. Stop over and check out all the wonderful poetry, and if so inspired, share yours!
32 comments:
It's a tough thing to juggle. Stay close to your family.
thought provoking One Shot
I have had several friends whose lives have been encroached by blogging - keep that in perspective my dear
Hugs from the Moon
@ Moon
Thanks dear. Yes, I feel like I'm juggling an insane amount of balls and I'm barely keeping them all up in the air.
Hang in there! You're AMAZING doing it all (mothering and career)!
Try not to let it overwhelm you....One day at a time!
I remember bringing work home too. I stopped doing that a long time ago. Work will get done when I get to work. The only thing I still do at home is check emails, but it's nothing more than reading. I hold the real work for when I'm on the job.
Try to find the right balance of making time for the paperwork while you're still on the clock, and getting the other things done too. Like anything else, you can do it. No one should have to bring work home. I learned, and so can you. Even with a stressful position.
Be the boss when you're at work.
When you're home, you need to be mommy.
I fight to stay present and I am only working part time a few hours a week. I can only imagine how difficult it is for you! But the fact that your boys knock you over when you walk in the door is proof enough that they feel your love!!! Hang in there with the new job - I hope it gets better for you...
Love your poetic voice and the photo you found fits it perfectly.
I bet with time it will get easier. And you are a lot more of a poet than I ever will be
bless your heart. God will supply all you will need.
i know you love tucking your boys in at night...you really must have a lot on your plate.
will be praying for you :)
Oh, I remember those days of juggling career and child. Not easy but it will all work out.
I'm no poet either but I give it a try too.
Nice to meet you at One Shot.
It is what we do as mother's give as we can, wonder what we are missing and try "not to skin ...knees"....a piece from the heart...thank you...bkm
I'm sure that you'll find balance. Give yourself a little time, this is still new.
Wow, someone out there feels just like I do. I am a professional working mom and it is tough. Thanks for expressing it way better than I could
Beautiful as always. I can see that merry go round coming at me at a million miles per hour. I'm scared and nervous.
This captured emotions brilliantly. I felt it, and remembered the time when my wife worked. I hated it, now we have not much and struggle but it is totally worth it . . . most of the time.
Well done here, stay in the fight for that separation!
yeah i tend to skin my knee more and more...
Praying for you.
This is beautiful. I really feel your struggle. And I appreciate how hard you work to balance everything.
I know I don't know you personally, but I read the things you write from your heart all the time...and you are an amazing, loving mom.
I don't suspect you'll lose that perspective. And that's what counts the most.
From your CM blog, (and the fact that you got promoted) you sound like a great cop, too.
I'm sure it is the newness of everything. Every time I've ever started a new job, it's been 1,000 times more stressful the first 6-8 months or so - just learning the ropes. That's probably where you're living right now.
I work with moms all the time in my ministry. Trust me - working moms always wonder if they're doing the right thing...and stay-at-home moms always wonder if they're doing the right thing, too.
It's the nature of moms to have guilt, I think.
But, I can tell from all you write, you're a great mom.
I'm certain you won't let that change.
Great moms always keep that in check - whether they're working moms or not.
:)
Be blessed today!
The image and words express overwhelming feeling amid all the demands of life. Very well done!
not easy to find the right balance...be careful to put your family first..
Your poem is so beautiful! I'll pray for you that the juggling act gets easier with your new position at work.
Your writing is so real, sober and refreshing. Thank you for sharing.
They say super busy is better than not busy at all--but perhaps you'd beg to differ. I hope as you adjust to your new role, things will calm down a bit for you.
Ohhhhh, sweet CM ~ You have nothing to worry about ... you are in the throes of JUST starting, settling, adjusting & organizing your new job/time. My philosophy was ~ works stays at work, Mommy stays at home ... it will settle down for you & your routine will become more acceptable to you, be patient ... give all a chance.
It is obvious the boys are very happy, well adjusted, beautiful kid-lings ... they love you, you love them ...
I am sending you great big HUGS to tide you over when your moments stress you, know most of us have been there in your shoes at one time or another.
Hope your Tsgiving holiday celebration was a beauty.
Huggers, sweetie ~
TTFN ~ Marydon
I feel ya, lady!! Its a terrible feeling too. Things will get better in time!! :)
I'm so sorry you are feeling that way, balancing work and motherhood is never easy but I can imagine it would be even harder with a job like that. I hope you can work everything out so work and the babies both get the attention they need. Saying a prayer for you. {hugs}
Just wandered over from "It's a southern thing". As a mom of two grown children I send you bunches of "you are amazing" and a prayer that you always find that connection with blessings to get you through. Your boys are perfect!
Ahh!! the travails of responsibilities of work like and the then there is that pseudo work-life balance... how is it possible when the work can not compare with living... and love.. I enjoyed it... so softly said your deepest angst..
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
Twitter: @VerseEveryDay
Blog: http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com
Relatable and emotionally direct (without losing a sense of 'poetic voice). Excellent.
Hello CM .. it is hard sometimes to be ever present especially when such a huge change has taken place. I'm 42 and I've been where you are. The guilt can be overwhelming, if you let it.
I would say to you... Go easy on yourself. You are a wonderful mother and a dedicated policewoman.
You will eventually find a balance that works but it takes time.
The more you become familiar in your new role the less & less it will impact on you at home. Take solace in knowing that in time, it will pass!
My husband and I were just talking about this. He is working later than normal and then comes home to take a college class with tons of homework plus scouts and kids. He feels like the kids are not getting him. Then the kids smile at him and it is all better
you can do this---balance is a daily juggling act--somedays it will be work and others your family--your boys will thrive if you are happy doing what you are doing--don't sweat the small things and revel in the possibilities--kudos to you and yours-c
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